Thursday, April 2, 2009

Movin’ on up

Oh my, what a week.  I’m feeling whelmed in both the good and bad sense of the word.  Did you know we found a house to rent in San Antonio?  Well, we found a house to rent in San Antonio!  floor planIt’s wonderful, huge, in a great GATED neighborhood.  It has a backyard, an Avelyn room, a Mom and Dad room, a guest room (this term used loosely since we have no extra mattress and I’m not a huge fan of house guests), a playroom (or dining room), an office, a big kitchen, a huge pantry, a 2 car garage, 2 bathrooms, a washer, dryer and lawn mower, a HUGE master closet, dozens of other closets, a covered patio, a fireplace… I’m leaving something important out.  Oh, it doesn’t have an entryway.  It has a “gallery”.  That’s what it’s called on the floor plan, a gallery.  Don’t that soun’ all sofistikated y’all?  “Oh Visitor Friend!  SO nice of you to stop by!  Won’t you please make your way through the GALLERY and join me on the settee in the parlour.”  Adding the ‘u’ to a word really makes it sparkle.  It’s like living in some exotic land like Wales or Canada. 

So that’s the first piece of good news.  The second is I PASSED THE HESI!  I didn’t blow it out of the water but I scored above what I needed to score to pass and am now eligible to graduate.  Whew!  What a load off.  Of course there are still papers to write, exams to pass, clinicals to finish, asses to kiss…  Also the fact that I never ordered my graduation “regalia” (who comes up with these words!?) because a) I forgot and then b) I didn’t want to on principle.  Why should I pay that much money for something I will wear for 2 hours?  Why don’t you have a rental plan???  Sigh.  I’m thisclose to purchasing another one online and hoping it won’t stand out to much.  Although even if it does I’m toying with the idea of waltzing across the stage, grabbing my diploma and then doing the Michael Jackson crotch pull while yelling at the top of my lungs “Suck it SON!  I bought this here regalia for a third of what you paid.  Shut yo’ FACE!”  Still haven’t decided, too much maybe?

Oy.  The bad part about graduation is it’s elevated level of importance.  I don’t like the attention a graduation ceremony entails.  I am not an attention whore. I  don’t get turned on or revved up by people fawning over me or my accomplishments, droning on and on, asking question after question, giving me gifts I didn’t want or ask for… I don’t need any of that.  I need Kevin and Avelyn to be there.  That’s pretty much it although I would like for our parents and my grandparents and my brother or sister if they wanted to come.  (That’s right Stephanie, because I have been too busy to call or write but since I know you read this blog even though you NEVER COMMENT YOU BAD BLOG READER! You should know you are invited to come if you want to.)  We’re planning on early dinner, graduation and HOME since Hobo needs her beauty rest.

And that’s it, just those people mentioned above.  Nobody else.  Nobody.  I wonder if that’s too subtle.  And no I will not remove this statement because if you will recall an earlier post from a mere two weeks ago (just two weeks!?) this is my blog and I can say whatever I want on my blog.  Even though out of respect for my husband and THE REST OF MY MARRIED LIFE I usually don’t.  See, I’m not even saying it now.  Anyway, if you will recall:

“…My therapist and friendapist both said the same thing – I should quit feeling guilty about my FEELINGS.  They’re MY feelings and it’s how I FEEL so I am allowed to FEEL this way dammit.”

Well, my FEELINGS are feeling like they don’t want anyone else to ruin MY day.  So I get to set the rules.  (Please stay tuned for the post-graduation post where I will proceed to angrily relive the inevitable breaking of these rules in order to keep family peace.  Because clearly my feelings do not matter much of the time.)

A very dramatic ANYWAY… Tonight I sit here thinking how freaking scared I am to graduate from nursing school with the implication I somehow know what to do to take care of people.  I mean I just spent two years in nursing school, shouldn’t I know more about how to nurse?!  (Hmm, note to Self: Look into whether being unable to successfully nurse your first born child is related to being unable to be a good nurse.  Kidding, Self.  Get a sense of humor already.)  Out of the 160 questions on the HESI I must have stared dumbfounded at 155 of them wondering in what universe I was supposed to have been taught this.  Whaaaaaa?  H-E-A-R-T?  What is a heart?  Do I have it?  Am I coming down with ‘heart’? IS THERE A CURE?  AAAAGGGGHHHHHH!!!!  Oh wait, that heart?

I am leaving for San Antonio first thing after Community Hellth clinical tomorrow.  We are getting Avelyn’s first birthday pictures and our first family pictures on Saturday.  We’re just going to the cruddy ol’ portrait studio for now because we don’t have the money to get the kind of pictures I want but we will do it sometime this year.  Hopefully we will have good weather and can get out of the house and have a family day at the park or something.  That reminds me, I can’t wait for April 15th when our lease starts and we can start the slow move in.  Do you understand the significance of this move?  Do you?  It means a house, not an apartment that shares walls with noisy neighbors.  It means living together, just the three of us for the FIRST time in twenty one months.  It means walking around in our underwear if we want to, just because.  It means freedom, independence, the ability to raise my daughter without being questioned and lectured about every cough, sneeze, out of place hair follicle, no matter how well meaning it may be.  It means not having to watch Fox News, heck not having the TV on 56 hours a day, being able to wake up at 7:30am with my baby and spend time alone with her, just me and her.  Above all it means all the mistakes, decisions, sacrifices and prayers have been worth it and we can start being the family I want us to be.

9 comments:

  1. I loved, loved, LOVED this post. You crack me up!
    I am SO excited for you about the house! It is so great!!

    And, note the time please...I am a faithful blog reader. Haha.

    Have a wonderful weekend love!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Congrats on EVERYTHING! :)

    We lived with my Dad for 3 years when my daughter was 1 so I totally get the walking around in your underwear thing. Not that you would, but it's nice to know you could.

    ReplyDelete
  3. YEA!!!! A house! H-O-U-S-E! A yard. A second bathroom. A room for Avelyn. A room for whatever you want. ROOM! So stinkin excited for y'all. That's fantastic.
    Oh, can I come to graduation? hahaha!

    ReplyDelete
  4. That extra room is for baby W. #2!! Hahahaha! Yeah I said it! Im so glad y'all are moving into a house! And by the way... I love your blunt honesty and your spunky attitude!

    ReplyDelete
  5. So when is the party...?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Yay you for passing!! You're almost done!!!

    The casa looks effin huge! I want a gallery too!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Yea for all the good stuff you have going on! A house, an almost graduation, a cute girl...

    Anyway, we are in SA for a couple of weeks and I went to North Star Mall yesterday. They were having a really good sale at Gymboree and I thought I remembered you getting Avelyn some stuff there before (see, someone is paying attention to your old posts!)

    Anyhow, I got some stuff for next winter (all under $10) and some stuff for the spring (dresses, rompers- all under $15). A Little Miss can never have enough clothes, right?

    So glad to hear everything's good. Oh, and the Kevin conversations are hilarious!

    ReplyDelete
  8. you crack me up!

    and the house sounds wonderful!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. I empathize with the feeling of not really having learned anything in nursing school. I am scared I will kill someone.

    Oh, and I'll be at your graduation whether you like it or not. So suck it.

    ReplyDelete

You're leaving ME a comment? Oh, I'm so flattered!