Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Survey says…!

I saw this survey going around on Facebook.  You’re supposed to get your kid to sit still for 10 minutes and ask the following questions.  I thought an interview whose every answer was a variation on “BLA BLA BLA!!!” wouldn’t be very interesting so I changed the “mom” to “I” and asked Kevin instead.  He’s sort of a child anyway.

J: What is something I always say to you?
K: I’m too tired.

J: What makes me happy? 
K: Your baby.  Avelyn and nothing else anymore.  Only Avelyn makes you happy.  That and Pink Bubblegum ice cream.
J: Oh that sounds really good right now…

J: What makes me sad?
K: Being away from Avelyn.

J: How do I make you laugh?
K: Your bitchy wit.

J: What was I like as a child?
K: No clue.  Well, I mean you were white trash. 
J: That’s just rude, man.
[Mutual laughing]
K: And true.  “It’s sqeeeeeeshy!”
[Near peeing laughing]

J: How old am I?
K: Soon to be 28.

J: How tall am I?
K: Five foot four… and one quarter.
J: Aw, you remembered!  You could write my obituary.
K: "She was five foot four and one quarter and is survived by her cat…”

J: What is my favorite thing to do?
K: [Loooooooooooooooooooooooong pause]  Everything is so Avelyn focused now.  I’m sure it’s something related to Avelyn.  But probably sit on the couch and watch LOST or something like that.
J: Good thing you added LOST to that because I never watch TV anymore and now that Tivo is wrapped up in his cardboard coffin in storage I never get to see LOST anymore either.  Or The Office.  Or 30 Rock.  Or my stories… Man I miss Tivo.

J: What do I do when you're not around?
K: Dance around in your underwear.
J: Hmm I don’t know about that.
K: You eat entire tubs of icing and stuff like that.
J: Shut yo’ face.

J: If I become famous, what will it be for?
K: Oh God, mass murderer or something like that.
J: Thanks a lot!
K: Well okay, you’ll probably be famous for blogging or something like that.

J: What am I really good at?
K: Uhh, too many things to mention.
J: Suck up.
[Laughing]
K: You’re good at being a nurse since people take pictures with you and stuff.  You’re good at taking care of Avelyn and taking care of me.  You’re a pretty good liar. 
J: OH, yes I am. 
K: Pretty good at baking stuff…

J: What am I not very good at?
K: Math. 
J: Phew, rude! and a little too quick to answer!  I’m pretty good at medication math now!
K: Well that’s true.  Okay, you’re not really good at, um, well you’re too empathetic.  You’re not very good at filtering out other peoples emotions.  You feel too much sometimes and it hurts you.

J: What do I do for my job?
K: Uh, you’re a nursing student.
J: Not for long, Bucko…

J: What is my favorite food?
K: Mexican.  Those tacos from La Hacienda (Taquitos de Pueblo, mmmm).  And those things at 100% Taquito (Tostadas de Aguacate, mmmm).

J: What makes you proud of me?
K: The way you are with Avelyn.  Persevering and going back to school, rather than giving up and settling on crap.

J: If I were a cartoon character, who would I be?
K: The Cheshire Cat.
J: Hmm interesting.
K: Yeah I know, that’s why I chose it.  You’re definitely not Dippy Dawg or Huckleberry HoundSnagglepuss, you’re not him.  You might be Bam Bam.

J: What do you and I do together?
K: Not have sex.  Not live in the same bed.  Not sleep in the same town.  Although we procrastinate together wonderfully.

J: How are you and I the same?
K: We’re both… [Looooooooooooooooong pause]
J: Clearly we have nothing in common. 
K: We’re both smart and funny. 
J: And ridiculously, ridiculously good looking. 
K: Yeah we’re that too.

J: How are you and I different?
K: Oh God let me count the ways.  You’re pretty organized.  I am NOT organized.  You’re emotional.  I’m not, well, yes I am.
J: You are NOT emotional.
K: Remember when Etta almost died?  I was emotional.
J: And now look where we are.  IN DEBT.
K: Also you have farmer teeth.  I have werewolf teeth.
[Laughing]
J: Ah man you’re funny, where do you come up with this crap?
[Laughing]

J: How do you know I love you?
K: I don’t.
J: A little too quick to respond there, buddy.
K: You’re still with me.
J: TRUE.  Remember that.

J: Where is my favorite place to go?
K: Not Houston.  You like parks.  We don’t really go many places. 
J: Yeah ‘cause we’re too freaking poor.
K: You like the beach although I’ve never been to the beach with you.  But you like the beach, you like the water.  We should go to the beach.

♥ 23 days to Avelyn’s FIRST birthday! ♥
♥ 44 days to Momma’s graduation! ♥
♥ 51 days until we live as a FAMILY again under ONE roof, just the THREE of us! ♥

10 comments:

  1. Hmm...I'm starting to see a theme here with the no sex part.

    And in what context are you a good liar?! The Jennifer I remember used to try to pretend that she was okay with people she wasn't but then her face kept getting pinker and pinker...

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  2. I love these dialogues that you have with Kevin. I can honestly hear you guys talking. I tried to get Tyson to do this but after the second question, he ran off and said "No thank you mommy!" And that was that.

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  3. BTW-I bought dooces's book yesterday from Amazon. I'm a bit excited to read it. :)

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  4. This is too funny! I want Dustin to answe these now! LOL

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  5. Damn you Carol, giving away my super secret lying ways! (PS - Remember when you found me under the drafting table? Ha ha ha ha.)

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  6. I think you should save his obit for you....

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  7. I happened onto your blog...I did the Facebook thing on my blog with my 6 year old but this was too funny!

    "shut yo' face" - I love it! :)

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  8. You guys are so cute! And I LOVE 100% Taquito... but my husband hates it, so I never get to go. Sad.

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  9. Hey there...
    you know i ought to admit..i steal things form your blog a lot...(questionnaire's)
    so anyway little update...life is goin good...ur blog definitely opens my eye to the set of problems i never understand in my own life...
    i think it is time to tell you my story...may be i will e-mail u..
    in short it is the same husband (me), wifey and kiddo who is 5 months younger to avelyn...
    But seriously, you blog is the best therapy I get ..... and regarding the medication and therapist part...well what can i say...i am in medical field and know all that but I dont think i need that yet...we will see
    Oh, I almost forgot..you are by far the best nurse I have come across...and i say that becos i come across many and very few are like you....sarcastic yet caring, pointed yet kind...

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  10. for the record, you are a terrible, terrible liar. perhaps the worst.

    I mean, you are pretty good at telling innocuous lies to strangers and customer service personnel, but thems street smarts.

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